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Prioritizing Your Intimacy

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    Welcome to Prioritizing Your Intimacy!
    1 Topic
  2. The science behind prioritizing your intimacy
    What do we mean by intimacy?
  3. The science behind prioritizing your intimacy
    1 Topic
  4. Love languages
    Love languages
    1 Topic
  5. Affection
    Catch your partner doing something right
    1 Topic
  6. Catch your partner doing something right
  7. Love Maps
    The importance of showing affection
    1 Topic
  8. Appreciation, recognition, and empathy
    The principle of building Love Maps
    1 Topic
  9. Appreciation
  10. Recognition
  11. Empathy
  12. The Four Horsemen
  13. Listening
    The Four Horsemen
    1 Topic
  14. Don't try and cheer your partner up
    Listen and learn
  15. Transforming criticism into wishes
    Don't always try and cheer your partner up
    1 Topic
  16. Process an argument
    Transforming criticism into wishes
    1 Topic
  17. Is Not Rocket Science
    Processing is a process
    1 Topic
  18. The 6-second kiss & the 20-second hug
    Your sexual relationship "is not rocket science"
    1 Topic
  19. Talking about sex
    The 6 second kiss & the 20 second hug
    1 Topic
  20. How many times a week
    How to learn and grow & what turns you on
    1 Topic
  21. How to reject your partner
    Is there a magic number?
  22. The art of compromise
    How to turn down sex
    1 Topic
  23. Self care isn't selfish
    What is a compromise?
    1 Topic
  24. Mutual masturbation
    Self care isn't selfish
    1 Topic
  25. Smartphones
    Mutual Masturbation = Hot AF
  26. Happiness is love
    Smartphone sabotage
    1 Topic
  27. Happiness = Love


Lesson 27 of 27
In Progress

Happiness = Love

BBXX November 13, 2020

A 75 year longitudinal study coming out of Harvard is proving that what makes us happy is perhaps much more simple, and enjoyable, that what we might expect.

When they first started compiling the results, they concluded that happiness comes from goodness; specifically, three types of goodness:

1. Doing good for others
2. Doing things they are good at
3. Doing good for me

However, decades later, the answer emerging appears to be even more simple, focusing on one kind of “good”: Happiness equals good relationships.

According to Robert Waldinger, the director of the center behind the study, “The clearest message that we get from this 75-year study is this: Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period.”

Happiness comes from choosing to be happy with whatever you do, strengthening your closest relationships and taking care of yourself physically, financially and emotionally.

So what can we do with this information, to help cultivate the most happiness in our lives?

We can focus on enhancing the three “goods” in our lives.

1. Good for others:

  • Cherish your most important relationships.
  • Be a contribution.

2. Good at it:

  • Do more of what you’re good at and less of what you’re not so good at.

3. Good for me:

  • Take care of yourself, your health and well-being, your financial security, and your work/life balance.

Strengthen your closest relationships

The most important happiness choice is to invest in your closest relationship whether it’s a spouse, partner, parent, sibling or friend.

It’s quality, not quantity, of these relationships that matters most.

  • 75% of those extremely happy give a top box rating to the importance of success in their intimate relationships
  • 77% of those extremely happy said the state of their relationship was either the “greatest” of “very good”

Take care of yourself physically, financially and emotionally

We all know that exercising and taking care of yourself correlates with good health.
The happiest among us actually do exercise and take care of ourselves.

  • 78% of those extremely happy said they exercise at least three times per week

According to Vaillant, the main conclusion is that “warmth of relationships throughout life have the greatest positive impact on ‘life satisfaction'”.

He says the study shows: “Happiness is love. Full stop.”

Watch the full Ted Talk here