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Prioritizing Your Intimacy

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  1. INTRODUCTION
    Welcome to Prioritizing Your Intimacy!
    1 Topic
  2. The science behind prioritizing your intimacy
    What do we mean by intimacy?
  3. The science behind prioritizing your intimacy
    1 Topic
  4. Love languages
    Love languages
    1 Topic
  5. Affection
    Catch your partner doing something right
    1 Topic
  6. Catch your partner doing something right
    Affection
  7. Love Maps
    The importance of showing affection
    1 Topic
  8. Appreciation, recognition, and empathy
    The principle of building Love Maps
    1 Topic
  9. Appreciation
  10. Recognition
  11. Empathy
  12. The Four Horsemen
    Homework
  13. Listening
    The Four Horsemen
    1 Topic
  14. Don't try and cheer your partner up
    Listen and learn
  15. Transforming criticism into wishes
    Don't always try and cheer your partner up
    1 Topic
  16. Process an argument
    Transforming criticism into wishes
    1 Topic
  17. Is Not Rocket Science
    Processing is a process
    1 Topic
  18. The 6-second kiss & the 20-second hug
    Your sexual relationship "is not rocket science"
    1 Topic
  19. Talking about sex
    The 6 second kiss & the 20 second hug
    1 Topic
  20. How many times a week
    How to learn and grow & what turns you on
    1 Topic
  21. How to reject your partner
    Is there a magic number?
  22. The art of compromise
    How to turn down sex
    1 Topic
  23. Self care isn't selfish
    What is a compromise?
    1 Topic
  24. Mutual masturbation
    Self care isn't selfish
    1 Topic
  25. Smartphones
    Mutual Masturbation = Hot AF
  26. Happiness is love
    Smartphone sabotage
    1 Topic
  27. Happiness = Love
Lesson 21 of 27
In Progress

Is there a magic number?

BBXX November 13, 2020
  • How many times a week do you and your partner have sex?
  • Is your answer the same as your partner’s?
  • Are you both happy with your number?
  • Would you feel comfortable sharing that number with someone else- why or why not?

Your homework for the day is to simply answer the questions above and then read the article below. We think you might be surprised by the findings, and you might even feel differently about your answers afterwards 😉

Check the video out at the end of the article for some funny insight into the thinking process of our favorite couples, Ben and Katie, when we asked them for their number.


“HERE’S HOW MUCH SEX YOU SHOULD HAVE EVERY WEEK.”

Americans today are having less of it than Americans a decade ago, according to a just-released study appearing in Archives of Sexual Behavior.  From 2010 to 2014, the average American adult had sex nine fewer times per year than Americans did from 2000 to 2004, the researchers found.

There are now so many other ways to spend leisure time at home,” says Jean Twenge, professor of psychology at San Diego State University.  For example, the allure of Netflix and other device-based diversions may be elbowing sex aside.

But despite these declines in hanky panky, our lives are far from sexless. The average adult enjoys sex 54 times a year, or a little more than once a week, Twenge’s data show.  While married couples under the same roof don’t fool around quite as much, they still have sex about 51 times each year.

But it turns out that’s a good thing, because having sex once a week may be “optimal” if you’re hoping to maximize happiness, according to research from Amy Muise, an assistant professor of psychology at York University in Canada.

Muise and her study team found that couples who have a lot of sex tend to experience better wellbeing. “Sex is associated with feeling more satisfied in a relationship,” Muise says.  But beyond once a week, the wellbeing benefits of sex seem to level off. That’s not to say that having sex a few times a week (or more) is a bad thing. It just doesn’t seem to make couples any happier, she says.

Of course, it’s hard to show cause and effect when it comes to sex and your health.  Leading a happy, healthy lifestyle likely leads to more sex; the act itself doesn’t necessarily improve your physical and mental wellness.  Still, whether sex is a symptom or a cause of wellbeing, a healthy sex life is worth the work.

If you’re falling short of that once-a-week quota, making an effort to have more sex could be a good idea, as long as it doesn’t feel too forced.

“When a couple has been together for some time, the mere presence of the other person, even unclothed, ceases to be exciting or arousing.”  But that doesn’t mean doing it won’t be just as fun and invigorating as it used to be, he says.  It may just take a little more work to get your fires started.

 

Read the article here

Audio article: