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Prioritizing Your Intimacy

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0/45 Steps
    Welcome to Prioritizing Your Intimacy!
    1 Topic
  2. The science behind prioritizing your intimacy
    What do we mean by intimacy?
  3. The science behind prioritizing your intimacy
    1 Topic
  4. Love languages
    Love languages
    1 Topic
  5. Affection
    Catch your partner doing something right
    1 Topic
  6. Catch your partner doing something right
  7. Love Maps
    The importance of showing affection
    1 Topic
  8. Appreciation, recognition, and empathy
    The principle of building Love Maps
    1 Topic
  9. Appreciation
  10. Recognition
  11. Empathy
  12. The Four Horsemen
  13. Listening
    The Four Horsemen
    1 Topic
  14. Don't try and cheer your partner up
    Listen and learn
  15. Transforming criticism into wishes
    Don't always try and cheer your partner up
    1 Topic
  16. Process an argument
    Transforming criticism into wishes
    1 Topic
  17. Is Not Rocket Science
    Processing is a process
    1 Topic
  18. The 6-second kiss & the 20-second hug
    Your sexual relationship "is not rocket science"
    1 Topic
  19. Talking about sex
    The 6 second kiss & the 20 second hug
    1 Topic
  20. How many times a week
    How to learn and grow & what turns you on
    1 Topic
  21. How to reject your partner
    Is there a magic number?
  22. The art of compromise
    How to turn down sex
    1 Topic
  23. Self care isn't selfish
    What is a compromise?
    1 Topic
  24. Mutual masturbation
    Self care isn't selfish
    1 Topic
  25. Smartphones
    Mutual Masturbation = Hot AF
  26. Happiness is love
    Smartphone sabotage
    1 Topic
  27. Happiness = Love


Lesson 16 of 27
In Progress

Transforming criticism into wishes

BBXX November 13, 2020

“In the heat of an argument, it’s easier to say what we don’t want rather than what we do want.”

For example: “I hate that as soon as you get home after work you turn on the TV.”

This is not an effective way to start a conflict discussion.

For conflict conversations to succeed, it is much more effective to state your feelings as neutrally as possible and transform your complaint about your partner into a positive need- one that your partner will actually want to fulfill.

Try this instead: “I miss you during the day.  When you come home and turn on the TV right away, it makes me feel distant from you. What if before you turn on the TV, we could take some time to talk about our days together?”

By expressing your desire in a direct, gentle, and neutral way, it is much more likely that your wish will come true.  And it’s always best when they think it’s their idea, right?  😉

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