- Casual Conversations: The Art of Self-Discovery
- Episode 57: Masculine vs. Feminine vs. HUMAN
- Casual Conversations: Don’t Apologize for Being Human
- Episode 56: The Complexity of Simplicity
- Casual Conversations: The Paradox of Perfection
- Food For Thought: Jealousy vs. Envy
- Food For Thought: Thankful vs. Grateful
- Episode 55: To Care for Others, Care for Yourself
- Casual Conversations: Anxiety, Boundaries, and Meditation
- Episode 54: Accessibility & Equity in Mental Health Care
- En Español: El Poder de la Mente Sobre el Cuerpo
- Episode 53: Sexual Liberation & The Wisdom of Aging
- Episode 52: Cohabitation, Gender Roles, and The Summer of Love
- Episode 51: The Lies We Tell Ourselves About The Truth
- Episode 50: An Industry of Injustice (4/4)
- Episode 49: This Is Actually Happening (3/4)
- Episode 48: Standing By vs. Being An Ally (2/4)
- Recommendations & Reviews: Boogie Nights
- Food For Thought: Contradiction vs. Complementation
- Food For Thought: Curiosity vs. Criticism
- Episode 47: Sexual “Empowerment” Sells (1/4)
- Recommendations & Reviews: The Culture Map
- Food For Thought: Celebrating The Small Wins
- Food For Thought: The Many Roads To Happiness
- En Español: Sexualidad e Igualdad
- Casual Conversations: Communication, Mindfulness, and Pleasure
- Food For Thought: Operational Definitions
- Food For Thought: Memory Tissue
- Episode 46: The Nutrition Facts of Life
- Casual Conversations: The Lost Art of Letter Writing
- Food For Thought: Attribution Theory
- Food For Thought: Coronavirus vs. Connection
- Bonus Episode: The Psychology of Solitary
- Episode 45: Love, Loss & The Meaning Of Life (2/2)
- Episode 44: Love, Loss & The Meaning Of Life (1/2)
- Live Workshop: Navigating Anxiety During COVID
- Episode 43: The Body Knows Best
- Episode 42: (Un)Censoring Pleasure
- Episode 41: Bring On The Heat (2/2)
- Episode 40: Bring On The Heat (1/2)
- Episode 39: The Myth of Marriage (2/2)
- Episode 38: The Myth of Marriage (1/2)
- Episode 37: Same Page, Different Book (2/2)
- Episode 36: Same Page, Different Book (1/2)
- Episode 35: Humans In Progress (2/2)
- Episode 34: Humans In Progress (1/2)
- Episode 33: The Strength In Our Scars (2/2)
- Episode 32: The Strength In Our Scars (1/2)
- Episode 31: Masculinity & Authenticity (2/2)
- Episode 30: Masculinity & Authenticity (1/2)
- Episode 29: Addiction & Intimacy – From Harm to Healing (2/2)
- Episode 28: Addiction & Intimacy – From Harm to Healing (1/2)
- New Trailer: Let’s Get Intimate!
- Episode 27: You Can’t Be What You Can’t See (2/2)
- Episode 26: You Can’t Be What You Can’t See (1/2)
- Episode 25: Why Relationships Fail vs. Flourish (2/2)
- Episode 24: Why Relationships Fail vs. Flourish (1/2)
- Episode 23: The Evolution of (Non)Monogamy (2/2)
- Episode 22: The Evolution of (Non)Monogamy (1/2)
- Episode 21: “Pleasure Is The Measure” (2/2)
- Episode 20: “Pleasure Is The Measure” (1/2)
- Episode 19: Sex Sells? Or Insecurity Sells… (2/2)
- Episode 18: Sex Sells? Or Insecurity Sells… (1/2)
- Episode 17: DON’T Fake It ‘Til You Make It (2/2)
- Episode 16: DON’T Fake It ‘Til You Make It (1/2)
- Episode 15: Mindfulness For Sexual Connection
- Episode 14: Keeping It “Casual” (2/2)
- Episode 13: Keeping It “Casual” (1/2)
- Episode 12: The Birds & The Bees (2/2)
- Episode 11: The Birds & The Bees (1/2)
- Episode 10: Love & Death
- Episode 9: Communication- Mind and Body
- Episode 8: The Power of Sexual Healing (2/2)
- Episode 7: The Power of Sexual Healing (1/2)
- Episode 6: Redefining Masculinity and “The Million Dollar Point”
- Episode 5: Creating Body Maps and Reconnecting with Pleasure
- Episode 4: (In) Fidelity in The Time of Technology
- Episode 3: Let’s Get Cliterate! Narrowing The Orgasm Gap
- Episode 2: Today’s Not So “Liberated” Sex Culture (2/2)
- Episode 1: Today’s Not So “Liberated” Sex Culture (1/2)
- Episode 0: Google doesn’t have all the answers
- Trailer: Let’s Get Intimate!
Let's Get Intimate!
Episode 21: “Pleasure Is The Measure” (2/2)
On this week’s episode, we speak with Emily Nagoski Ph.D, a sexual wellbeing educator and author of one of our favorite books, Come As You Are, as well as Burnout. We cover the gamut in discussing how to listen to your inner voice and have compassion for your inner madwoman as well as how our anatomy is made of the same parts, just configured differently. We hope that you enjoy learning about ways to have more self compassion and understand yourself. *Moana spoilers included.
Learning to listen to your internal voice – what feels right for you? What doesn’t feel right? Especially if you have a more subtle inner voice, here are some tips to help you gain access: begin to recognize that as a “girl” you have been cultured from birth to not believe in your voice, and you can undo this through a mindfulness practice. Learning to quiet both the interior and exterior noises around you to listen to your inner critic with kindness and compassion.
Recognizing a mistake rather than an inherent character flaw. By turning towards our inner mad woman with kindness and compassion, you can learn about your fear, rage, and worry, so that you can more fully grow and address those fears. Many women express that their inner madwoman is
angry, but incredibly vulnerable. Emily describes this madwoman as being like Te Ka (lava monster) who is really Te Fiti (goddess of life).
Come As You Are
All of our bodies are made of all the same parts, just organized in a different way.
An example of this is the Labia Majora, which is stretchy skin that will grow hair later, which is the same tissue as the scrotum, also stretchy skin that will grow hair later. In the womb, this tissue is called scrotal-labia tissue.
Another example is how the penis is similar to the clitoris – both include a sensitive head with a structure that swells when aroused. If you don’t know about the internal clitoris – check it out here and share your knowledge far and wide!
What’s up with the Hymen?
The hymen is just leftover tissue from differentiation in utero. Most of what we think we know about the hymen is cultural bullshit. The idea that the hymen is a symbol of whether or not a vagina has been penetrated is a lie. Patriarchal society used the hymen as a marker for “purity” when in reality, scientific evidence proves this completely wrong; there is no relationship
between a person’s hymen and their sexual activities.
Behavior is a snapshot at what’s happening in a person’s life, but the way to actually know what’s happening takes a much deeper dive.
Trying to understand sex by looking at behavior is like trying to understand love by looking at a couple’s wedding portrait.
Bikini Industrial Complex
A profit machine that only makes money when we hate our bodies and are convinced we need to change them in some way. Not to mention, that this “thin ideal” is a 500 Billion dollar industry!
By learning to love ourselves, we can step away from the cultural scripts that continually make women feel less than when it comes to their bodies.
About the Expert
A gifted and engaging speaker, Emily is an expert on women's sexual wellbeing, healthy relationships, and the prevention of sexual violence and harassment. People bring Emily, because Emily "brings the science."