- Episode 49: This Is Actually Happening (3/4)
- Episode 48: Standing By vs. Being An Ally (2/4)
- Recommendations & Reviews: Boogie Nights
- Food For Thought: Contradiction vs. Complementation
- Food For Thought: Curiosity vs. Criticism
- Episode 47: Sexual “Empowerment” Sells (1/4)
- Recommendations & Reviews: The Culture Map
- Food For Thought: Celebrating The Small Wins
- Food For Thought: The Many Roads To Happiness
- En Español: Sexualidad e Igualdad
- Casual Conversations: Communication, Mindfulness, and Pleasure
- Food For Thought: Operational Definitions
- Food For Thought: Memory Tissue
- Episode 46: The Nutrition Facts of Life
- Casual Conversations: The Lost Art of Letter Writing
- Food For Thought: Attribution Theory
- Food For Thought: Coronavirus vs. Connection
- Bonus Episode: The Psychology of Solitary
- Episode 45: Love, Loss & The Meaning Of Life (2/2)
- Episode 44: Love, Loss & The Meaning Of Life (1/2)
- Live Workshop: Navigating Anxiety During COVID
- Episode 43: The Body Knows Best
- Episode 42: (Un)Censoring Pleasure
- Episode 41: Bring On The Heat (2/2)
- Episode 40: Bring On The Heat (1/2)
- Episode 39: The Myth of Marriage (2/2)
- Episode 38: The Myth of Marriage (1/2)
- Episode 37: Same Page, Different Book (2/2)
- Episode 36: Same Page, Different Book (1/2)
- Episode 35: Humans In Progress (2/2)
- Episode 34: Humans In Progress (1/2)
- Episode 33: The Strength In Our Scars (2/2)
- Episode 32: The Strength In Our Scars (1/2)
- Episode 31: Masculinity & Authenticity (2/2)
- Episode 30: Masculinity & Authenticity (1/2)
- Episode 29: Addiction & Intimacy – From Harm to Healing (2/2)
- Episode 28: Addiction & Intimacy – From Harm to Healing (1/2)
- New Trailer: Let’s Get Intimate!
- Episode 27: You Can’t Be What You Can’t See (2/2)
- Episode 26: You Can’t Be What You Can’t See (1/2)
- Episode 25: Why Relationships Fail vs. Flourish (2/2)
- Episode 24: Why Relationships Fail vs. Flourish (1/2)
- Episode 23: The Evolution of (Non)Monogamy (2/2)
- Episode 22: The Evolution of (Non)Monogamy (1/2)
- Episode 21: “Pleasure Is The Measure” (2/2)
- Episode 20: “Pleasure Is The Measure” (1/2)
- Episode 19: Sex Sells? Or Insecurity Sells… (2/2)
- Episode 18: Sex Sells? Or Insecurity Sells… (1/2)
- Episode 17: DON’T Fake It ‘Til You Make It (2/2)
- Episode 16: DON’T Fake It ‘Til You Make It (1/2)
- Episode 15: Mindfulness For Sexual Connection
- Episode 14: Keeping It “Casual” (2/2)
- Episode 13: Keeping It “Casual” (1/2)
- Episode 12: The Birds & The Bees (2/2)
- Episode 11: The Birds & The Bees (1/2)
- Episode 10: Love & Death
- Episode 9: Communication- Mind and Body
- Episode 8: The Power of Sexual Healing (2/2)
- Episode 7: The Power of Sexual Healing (1/2)
- Episode 6: Redefining Masculinity and “The Million Dollar Point”
- Episode 5: Creating Body Maps and Reconnecting with Pleasure
- Episode 4: (In) Fidelity in The Time of Technology
- Episode 3: Let’s Get Cliterate! Narrowing The Orgasm Gap
- Episode 2: Today’s Not So “Liberated” Sex Culture (2/2)
- Episode 1: Today’s Not So “Liberated” Sex Culture (1/2)
- Episode 0: Google doesn’t have all the answers
- Trailer: Let’s Get Intimate!
Let's Get Intimate!
Episode 35: Humans In Progress (2/2)
In this week’s episode, we chat with Joanne Encarnacion — better known as @gofitjo — a holistic health and life coach based in San Francisco who is dedicated to helping womxn “redefine wellness of the heart, mind, and soul on their own terms.” We discuss her personal journey of battling depression and the watershed moment when she decided to take back her life through health and fitness. We also chat about the double-edged sword of social media, the importance of sharing your “highlight real” instead of the “highlight reel,” and lessons from parenthood. The conversation is full of self-love, body positivity, and the power of womanhood — we hope you enjoy the wisdom shared!
Combating Depression With Health & Fitness
We don’t need to read the countless studies extolling the physical and mental benefits of exercise — by now we know that breaking a sweat is a tried and true remedy for managing depression, anxiety, and down days in general. But just in case you needed a factual reminder, here’s a quote from Dr. Michael Craig Miller, an assistant professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School: “In people who are depressed, neuroscientists have noticed that the hippocampus in the brain—the region that helps regulate mood—is smaller. Exercise supports nerve cell growth in the hippocampus, improving nerve cell connections, which helps relieve depression.”
With that said, putting to practice what we already know is difficult, even more so if any level of depression is involved. This is why it’s important to be mindful of suggesting exercise as any easy fix to those who are dealing with depression (or feeling guilty yourself). Start slow, nix any shame, and learn to relish the process of being active.
I refer to exercise as “endorphin therapy.” I’m a strong believer in it being my number one, most important medicine.Sasza
Anti-Depressants Are Palliative, Not Curative
Jo mentions how she chose to eschew anti-depressants (which she had previously taken as a teen) and instead turned to health and fitness to cope with her depression as an adult. While anti-depressants may help treat depression, it’s important to note that they are a palliative treatment, not curative. What’s more, only one third of people with depression benefit from antidepressants at all, making it clear that there is no one-size-fits-all treatment.
Social Media: Damaging or Beneficial?
Half a million tweets and Snapchat photos are shared every minute. It’s clear social media has become the latest addiction, but how is it affecting our mental health? A study from 2016 found that people who regularly used social media were three times more likely to be depressed and anxious, while another study found that viewing people’s selfies lowered self-esteem. Jo points that social media can be overwhelmingly toxic and incredibly beneficial — depending on how (and how much) you use it. She suggests doing a “social media cleanse” by unfollowing any accounts that elicit a negative reaction and being mindful of time wasted by using the screen time app.
What Relationship Do You Desire With Your Own Body?
The relationship that I desire with my own body is one that feels liberated from the inside out. When I think about the idea of liberation and what that embodiment means, to me that means the freedom to speak my truth, no matter what it is . . . I want to be my best friend, ultimately.
The Wisdom of Womanhood
Jo recounts the moment she truly stepped into her womanhood: while breastfeeding her second daughter, she realized that she had a purpose that was deeper than and beyond herself. “I knew that life wasn’t just about me anymore. And it wasn’t necessarily just about my kids, but I just remember feeling that I’ve got a greater purpose.”
The word “woman” is truly an embodiment. There’s something about embodying a sense of life wisdom, where you know that you’re giving it back to somebody else. That to me is the moment you cross that threshold of womanhood.
“Truth. Being able to emotionally and intellectually connect with somebody on a truth-based level…it’s an uncensored version of who you are in that moment.” Jo explains how she and her partner had to work through their own disparate ideas of what intimacy really meant. Whereas her partner initially viewed intimacy as solely physical, Jo describes the importance of emotional and intellectual intimacy.
“Rejection is Redirection”
Rejection is so often seen as a failure, but Jo urges us to view it as a necessary stepping stone to finding things that are more in alignment with our true selves.
For every success point, there’s a thousand failures before you actually reach one success point. You have to make mistakes.
What is success?
Jo defines success as living each day with purpose, whatever that might mean to an individual. “It’s an opportunity to learn every day, that’s what success is.” She emphasizes that although your purpose may change and fluctuate, the power lies in working your way towards that purpose and reveling in your own constant evolution.
Lessons Learned From Parenthood
“You’re gonna fuck up,” Jo laughs candidly. The truth is, there’s no all-encompassing guidebook on how to be a parent. Instead of trying to be perfect, Jo urges parents to embrace (and own up to) mistakes. By showing your children that you are a flawed, evolving human, you give them the space to make mistakes gracefully.
About the Expert